why i will not vote for modi

let us assume that modi had nothing to do with the 2002 riots. 
let us also assume that he has no pressure or influence from the RSS
let us also assume that this vibrant gujrat they so fondly speak of exists.

but let us not forget that the BJP harbours, amit shah, muthalik, the yeddi family and other just to name a few. nor should we forget that modi holds most of the ministerial posts in gujrat. (refer
link ) and assuming he is doing a good job at all these portfolios.

here is why i still think modi is still not the right person for the job. because it is not a one man job. that is not what a democracy is, and it is never going to be a sustainable way to grow anything. and you don’t see him acknowledging that at all. 

‘aab ki baar modi sarkar’ is all you hear all over, its a well thought out campaign, it works well as a punch line, but the idea itself is totalitarian. its not about us being governed, its about us being led. 

He seems to want HIS government. HE will to govern. and i think he wants it too bad. contesting from 2 places can only show you are not confident of your victory or that you don’t care about the people who elect you there just that you are elected. both mocking the fundamental principles of democracy as it stands. i, or anyone who votes, is supposed to vote for their local rep, so best case scenario he wins from both places, but has to choose, the one that got shafted, gets a candidate they don’t want, or has to spend on reelections. 

taking the company and CEO analogy again, assuming the company has this super star CEO candidate who controls everything, is all hands on and will manage everything good bad and ugly for your 1.2 billion and counting strong company and is deemed irreplaceable, i would be very scared of putting him in that position. because tomorrow when he leaves, you and i as stakeholders in this large company are left up shits creek with no functioning upper middle or lower management and with no sense of how or why things got done. it would be like investing in a proprietary business, where if the head honcho leaves, we got nothing left. anyone in the business of business would tell you its a bad bad idea. its the governance equivalent of putting all your eggs in one basket. it may work for the short term, depending on the resolve and intent of the basket in question, but there is no way it will be good for the long run and there is an even lesser possibility that it will be done with the transparency that we hope we will have.

but then why the appeal of modi?
exactly the same reasons why he shouldn’t be elected top hat. because we love the idea of steve jobs, we love the idea of our one true saviour. we don’t see the thousands of people dedicating their lives to bettering technology so steve could do his 15 minutes of fame, we refuse to see the machine that works tirelessly behind the idea of the saviour for him to be able to reach out. we love the idea of a one man disruption. we yearn for an uprising. we hate the idea of design by committee, we don’t like conflicts or debates. we want deciders and we want doers. and we don’t care who does it, we want one person to blame when the plan fails, and we want one person to worship if it holds up. we are the nation that worshipped and then pelted stones at dhonis house in the same week. we are short sighted because that is how elections are campaigned for.

if it was ab ki baar ki sarkar, we should still be fine… but modi ki sarkar, would literally translate to the rule of modi, to which i say… no sir not on my vote, and not on my land.  

so who should we vote for then? if the congress has done us wrong, the aap is too green and too loud to be a team player and the third front is still not fully formed to be taken that seriously. 

in my opinion, we should vote for the house. the entire assembly and not just the government. a strong and intelligent opposition is as crucial as a strong government is. if all these scams happened under the governance of the congress, then the BJP and allies sat there and watched them happen. they are as much to blame as those in power are. 

so go look for your local candidate, find their stand on the issues that concern you,, (without getting physical, for that is just sad) and then when you are convinced… vote him or her in and then make sure that they live up to the promises they made and be sure to give them the time to do such things. 

(face meet palm) x (n+1)

"we are outraged"

by what?

"this party that claims to have only morally superior clean-as-saints members has a guy who has done morally questionable thing"

like the '84 massacre?


the '02 one then?


is it anything like the shaming of the indian winter olympic team not being able to carry their flag because you refuse to clean up your act?

"no, nothing like that."

then what?

"he sent out spam mails. it is outrageous.we are outraged."


i try maintaining a list of things i should do each day. i wake up, i feed it in my phone, which syncs it to my work computer, to my laptop, my iPad, my iPod even to make sure i remember no matter what.  i write it in an un-readable script with a pen meant for greater things, into an overpriced notepad so that i remember the things i have to do, i write it with black ink and strike it with blue at the end of each task. that way if i have a blue dominant page, its a good day, if its a black dominant page its an unproductive day.

today, just like any other day i started with the lists, in my phone, in the notepad, synced to my computer at work and the one i carry around. i woke up thinking i have things to do, lets make a list and get to crossing things off. lets blue the damn page! but nooooo, life as it always does, has other plans. life woke up this morning, had one thing on its list. one thing in black. lets screw someones day. i think life has just that on its list, every day. wake up, pick one person. mess with his day, blue that black and go back to sleep. thats it. one thing, and it does it well. oh yes. it takes all the fun in doing so too.. it seems to take all the productivity lists seriously, the ones that tell you how to get creative at your job, and it puts them to good use. it gets creative so you cannot. life gets all kinds of ideas at work. like making sure something that should not have happened happens. and something that absolutely must, doesn't. it takes its own sweet time watching you plan a day, snickering from the back for having had new ideas of how to mess up with the least amounts of things to do and does them. like giving you a bad stomach on a day with a lunch meeting at your favourite joint.

this was my day.

i woke up made the list while having a headache and a problem involving breathing that i have not had since the late 90s (i am not that old, the problem on the other hand... ). a bad stomach was waiting round the corner to complete the trifecta of a bad morning. now, the only thing one wants on such mornings, is the ability to crawl back under the blanket and pass out, but i had phone calls from work about things that i should not have had phone calls about. i attended to those, made sure the people who had to have had these looked into were going to look into them and went about my morning. i had a 10 am meeting that i wanted to cancel but in the interest of work i went ahead and attended it.

now there are a list of things that drive me up the wall, really, but if you are late to a meeting only made necessary because i don't think you will understand things over the phone... i am in a rage that will make the fires of hell look like a sunburn. but if you cancel on me 15 minutes after we were supposed to meet... well... i don't think we have a word for that yet. and that was the beginning of the end. places i had to go that i didn't want to, things i had to do that i don't like to, a bad stomach over lunch, a deadline i would have rather missed and all that.

to cut it short, (if that is possible now) because i am late for a dinner i don't want to eat owing to my current gastro-predicament, the point of this rant really is that i was made life's bitch today.. tomorrow hopefully.. ah fuck it! who am i kidding... tomorrow is going to be another today.. because life as it see it.. has started to commit to one hobby... me!

End ordinary.

End ordinary.
something i read on the internet.

Ordinary is a coffin for your Amazing, your Remarkable, your Outstanding.
Sure, it’s lined with the most comfortable velvet and padded with the softest down, but it is suffocating.
We all have our Amazing, our Remarkable and our Outstanding.
We feel them deeply even if we cannot yet name them.
We sense them as longings, yearnings to work and live in different ways; a need to be different.
We nurture them in the soft places inside where we keep them hidden, protected, safe from harm.

After all if we were to expose them, they would come under scrutiny from a possibly harsh world that might not understand, that might be envious or sceptical.
Of course, within that scrutiny they might amaze other people (let’s call them clients) as well.
People would remark upon our Remarkableness and our Outstanding.
 We would be set apart from the rest of the group, conspicuous in our openness, our vulnerability and boldness. It could be dangerous. What if people mocked? What if they turned away? What if no-one understood? What if people tut-tutted and demanded to know “Who do you think you are?” What if we make a mistake? And so, for far too many, we climb back into the soft, warm, stifling velveteen embrace of the Ordinary once again.
We do what we have always done, and although we may do what is ordinary exceptionally well, it is still the Ordinary. We lie there burning up inside knowing there are other ways of doing things, other things that we really need to be doing to be ourselves and fulfil our potential. But, you see, as long as we stay with Ordinary then we know what is what.
 We know what to expect.
We know where we are going, I know how many pounds and pence I can expect to earn this year, next year and the year after that. It’s safe, right? It feels secure. We know what our position and role is even though we may be disatisfied with it. And sure, the Amazing, the Remarkable and the Outstanding smart and burn on the inside as they fight to break out but we can always anesthetize that with the stuff and mediacation that Ordinary offers us, right?
 So, how is your ordinary for you? Safe, comfortable, good enough? What does it look like? And if you were to step out and work on the outside of ordinary, what would that look like? What would you be doing differently?
What do you need to do to move towards that?
What would other people be Amazed at seeing in you – the stuff that previously they had no idea you were capable of?
What remarks would your Remarkable draw out of those people you work with, the people you live with, the clients you serve? What would they be saying now?
And if you released your Outstanding, where might it take you once you were really standing out from the crowd?
End ordinary.

Get artisan

day zero.

day zero: the return. couldn't sleep on the flight thanks to the 3 babies in front and their unstoppable crying. had more legroom thanks to the skinny folks next to me. ate asian meal with more cauliflower than humanly consumable. didn't like it. slept a little. got off the plane. waited at the baggage claim for 2 hours to get my bags off. waited for 7 hours for Akshay Modak to show up. went to the hyatt and had to fight with a cabbie to not get looted. won. almost. went to the airport medical institute to get akshay a yellow fever shot. he took the shot. nothing changed. went off to a theatre. saw spiderman. sat next to a girl who thought tobey maguire was better. tried not to kill her. succeeded. loved the movie. met a friend of a friend and dropped off a package. she was happy. had mcDonalds at panvel like it was part of a religious experience. left for home. slept in the car. no babies cried... slept well. went straight to office. showed akshay office. he said he liked it. left food behind. saw it get over faster than i could have eaten it. impressed.  came home. showered. ate. slept. for 10 hours. like a dead man. with no babies around. woke up to phone calls and work demands. hated it. met old landlord. rembebered why i stayed away from them. had tea. had another tea. almost had a third tea before i had to leave. went off to fix a flat tyre on the bike. rode it. loved it. went to work. hardly did anything. had meetings. met friends. had lunch. thank you Sean Mathew and Nisha George. i hope you make this a habit. (without shepu next time). went back to office. left immediately. had a meeting. a good won. had a tart at The Flour Works, mind blown again. came home. dinner. work. and more work. but definitely no wailing babies will keep me up tonight. end rant. good night sweet world. i will be dreaming of the last 15 days now. :)